Peer pressure (or social pressure) is the direct influence on people by peers, or the effect on an individual who gets encouraged to follow their peers by changing their attitudes, values or behaviors to conform to those of the influencing group or individual. This type of pressure differs from general social pressure because it causes an individual to change in response to a feeling of being pressured or influenced from a peer or peer group. Peer pressure starts from when an individual starts having inferiority complex around his or her peers, this would lead to the individual gradually seeing things he sees as black and white as different shades of gray. Take for example, a child is taught from childhood that sex is wrong before marriage but when he or she becomes a teenager and his peers start describing different scenarios of sexual acts, little by little, he or she gets pressured into trying it out and from there continues.
For an adult, he or she has always had a view of not cheating someone else but when amidst peers and hear of how they've cheated and gone scot free, they begin to waver till they cave in. Or of their mates getting married, then they are pressured into getting married without really knowing who they are getting married to. There are so many examples that different people will relate with but cant be mentioned here.
Are you being pressurized... Read on and find out how you can overcome peer pressure.
Some of the main causes of peer pressure are related to age-appropriate behavior. Adolescents develop a strong desire to fit in with their peers and be accepted by them. This desire makes adolescent peer pressure tough to resist.
Peer pressure can cause us to make certain choices about whether to drink alcohol or use drugs, what to wear, who to be friends with, or whether or not to skip school, for example. Peer pressure can also impact our decision to engage in sexual behaviors. Sometimes, young people might be pressured into physical activity they aren't ready for.
INFLUENCES
1. Normative influence:
can make us do things that we might not normally. It's pressure that encourages us to try and fit in with our peers or our group of friends.
2. Informational influence:
is a little bit different. This kind of pressure influences our opinions or preferences so that we're more in line with the preferences of people we're spending time with.
3. Facilitative influence:
This encourages us to engage in certain behaviors because the people we're with make it easy for us to have access.
How to Overcome Peer Pressure
1. Ask 101 questions
For example, if a pal pressures you to sleep with a man, ask her why she sleeps with every Dick and Harry, how long she she became hooked, if she minds having her womb ruptured if perhaps she gets pregnant and goes for abortion or if it's a guy, if he's ready to be a father, not in name but in actions.2. Back-up a no with a positive statement.
For example, if you’re turning down an offer to be sexually immoral, reply with something like "I'm saving myself up for my husband" Or you are being told to get a husband, reply with "I'm gonna live the rest of my life with him, please let me enjoy my being single a little more.
3. Be repetitive.
Don’t hesitate to state your position over and over again, don't say it once and make them feel you want to be persuaded.
4. Practice saying no.
Practice saying ‘no’ in safe environments, like when your big brother asks you if you’d like to spend Saturday night doing his laundry or your sister wants you to do the dishes in her place.
5. Avoid stressful situations in the first place.
If you know there’s going to be alcohol or drugs at a party, make other plans. Or, if you’re going out with a guy, avoid being alone with him... anywhere he might pressure you to get more physical than appropriate. Or if you'll know they will ask of who asked you out and so on, avoid seeing them.
6. Get away from the pressure zone.
You couldn't avoid not going? Leave the scene… make your exit as fast as possible.
7. Confront the leader of the pack.
The best way to handle a peer pressure bully is to nab him (or her) when the two of you are alone and explain how you’re feeling and ask him/her to get off your case. Or tell him or her to go deal with trying to make everyone like him.
8. Consider the consequences
9. Look for positive role models.
Ever notice that the real popular and successful teens at your school are the ones who weren’t afraid to say what they like and don’t like?
Build your confidence by using positive people as your role models.
10. Don’t buy the line that everyone’s doing it.
The truth is, if everyone was doing, why are you still not doing it. Since you've not been doing it, you didn't die, so definitely not everyone is doing it.
11. Seek support.
It is said that misery loves company. Search and talk out any peer pressure you’re experiencing with other friends who are also feeling the squeeze. I can be reassuring to know that you’re not the only one.
12. Be your own best friend.
Remind yourself every now and then that you’re special and nuke any negative statements. Look yourself in the mirror and say good things about yourself to yourself.
13. Find ways to excel.
Focus your attention on following your personal goals instead of the goals of the group. Remember that not everyone can be a doctor or a lawyer. Be unique in your own *Virtues*
14. Don’t pressure others.
Do unto others what you want done to you and vice versa. Watch out for any not so obvious forms of pressure you may be exerting.
15. Watch your moods.
Be aware that your moods can affect your sensibility. When you are feeling down, be on the guard cos that's when you're most vulnerable.
16. Evaluate your friendships.
If your friends are always disturbing you to do something you’re not comfortable with, remember that true friends like you for who you are, not who they want you to be.
17. Find new friends.
If you’ve gotten to a conclusion that your friends don’t have your best interests at heart, search out new friends who share your values and interests.
Remember that you are important. Your life counts, and you can make a difference in this world and you alone are responsible for your life.
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